Almost MasterGrape

Is this the MasterGrape blog?

Posted in Wine Memes by Ryan O'Connell on January 26, 2009

The MasterGrape blog is actually at
That’s the blog where I talk about how you can make wine in France and why you ought to do it. This blog is the deleted scenes, extended director’s cut deluxe premium super-fly edition that has all sorts of rubbish I would never force my clients to read. Memes, funny movies, etc.

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Promoting Languedoc Roussillon Wines

Posted in Wine Memes by Ryan O'Connell on November 19, 2009

Love that Languedoc, video blog

Hey, I started a vlog promoting Languedoc Roussillon wines and the region in general.   It’s called Love That Languedoc and it’s pretty fun.  The Languedoc Roussillon is one of the largest wine producing regions on the planet and it is an incredibly diverse region that deserves a lot more public attention.  And that is what I am going to obtain!  YOUR ATTENTION!

So thank you for checking out the Almost MasterGrape blog and PLEASE take some time to learn about the Languedoc-Roussillon whether it’s in your favorite reference books or my video tributes.  There’s a lot to appreciate.

The blog will comprise of interviews, tastings, guided visits and book reviews amongst other things.  It’s a no holds barred look at all things LANGUEDOC.  I hope I’ll see you there!

The Best Job in the Wine World

Posted in Wine Memes by Ryan O'Connell on April 24, 2009
The murphy goode job

The murphy goode job

After the success of the Australia dream job campaign, I’m not surprised to see a similar stunt in the wine world [via the winery website report].

A Really Goode Job [sic] at the Murphy-Goode Winery in Sonoma.

I don’t know how fun it will be since they don’t release the details til the end of April.  But it seems promising.  $60,000 USD for six months of what will presumably be blogging, tweeting and hanging out at an all you can drink wine buffet.  SOUNDS CUSHY.

If you’re looking for a job and you enjoy wine and the Internet, this is a nice 6 month buffer.

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Dharma Initiative Merlot – Lost Wine

Posted in Wine Memes by Ryan O'Connell on April 9, 2009
What we drink on the island.

What we drink on the island.

How is this not a reality yet?  Seriously.  If somebody is in a position to make this happen, hit it.

If you can’t wait to serve a bottle of Dharma Initiative Merlot at your next party or Lost-watching get together, you can print out your own label from Max Pictures and glue it to a bottle [via Winery Website Report].

But don’t stop at Merlot.  There are lots of DHARMA product labels at that website.

Wine Club April Fool!

Posted in Wine Memes by Ryan O'Connell on April 1, 2009

My mom just got a great email from a wine club we work with.

la Revue des Vins de France vient d’élire l’Épicuvin “meilleur club de dégustation de France” pour 2009
et nous offre en cadeau  une caisse de Romanée-Conti 2001
c’est incroyable, je suis aux anges !!!!!

j’ai envie de vous faire partager ce divin cadeau, tombé du ciel
Je vous propose donc de participer gratuitement à une dégustation où nous goûterons les 6 grands crus du domaine dont la fameuse et mythique Romanée-Conti
la date est déjà fixée ce sera le samedi 25 avril prochain
si cela vous intéresse j’enregistre les 20 premiers qui répondent à ce mail.


It basically reads: “The Wine spectator has named us America’s best wine club!  As a prize, they’re offering us a full case of Romanée-Conti.

We couldn’t be any happier.  To celebrate, we’ll be tasting the bottles on April 25th. The first 20 people who respond to this email will be able to participate.”
Of course, APRIL FOOLS.  Or April fish as the French put it.

Flying Spaghetti Monster wine reviews

Posted in Wine Memes by Ryan O'Connell on March 31, 2009
artist rendering of His Noodliness

artist rendering of His Noodliness

Yea, verily, the Flying Spaghetti Monster has appeared at one of the MasterGrape vineyards, touching us with His blessed noodly appendage.

I expect a drastic boost in sales now that His Noodliness has publicly announced his love of my wine.

As a matter of fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if some Pastafarian wine lovers got together and started a MasterGrape barrel.  They could even put his Noodliness on the bottle’s label!  

And they could demand that I only follow the strictest tenets of Pastafarianism while making the wine.  We’ll make kosher look like a walk in the park.  Plus, Manischewitz doesn’t go with pasta at all.  

What’s that? You want proof?  Well I took pictures.  Please note that the meatballs are transubstantiated as garlic flowers.  Could this be a coincidence?  Of course not.  His Noodliness and all FSMists love garlic and he has chosen this vessel wisely.  His eye stalks are stalks of vines.  And the eyes are the eyes of the vine cane.  These are not linguistic coincidences.  These are reasoned proof of His presence.

His noodly appendage has touched my vines

His noodly appendage has touched my vines, and in the form of two grape stalks and two garlic flowers.


Slightly more secretive, you can still see His Noodly Appendage at work.

Slightly more secretive, you can still see His Noodly Appendage at work.

What does this mean?

Perhaps He would like to provide an alternative to the Sacrament. 

Perhaps this means you never have to ask me what goes well with MasterGrape wine again.  It goes well with Spaghetti.  And godliness.  If you have any other pictures of his Noodliness or the Pirate Fish smiling upon wine, send them to me!

Underage Drinking

Posted in Wine Memes by Ryan O'Connell on March 28, 2009
Before the Loi Evin

Before the Loi Evin

With all the fuss about advertising alcohol in France, it’s a good time to look back at all the old ads and posters and postcards and whatnot.

Here’s a toddler who wants to be more like Grandpa.

See more awesome ads including “Beer is good for nursing mothers!” at SOWINE.

Label Design Contest

Posted in Wine Memes by Ryan O'Connell on March 16, 2009

If you are a bit of an artist or a graphic designer, you should know there is a contest going on to design a label for Glorie Farm Winery’s “Red Quartet”.  The entries are pretty lame so far, so you have a decent chance.

This won last years contest.

This won last year's contest.

There is a $10 entry fee which apparently goes to an unnamed New York animal shelter.  If you win, there seems to be a cash prize (according to the 99designs site) and your design will be put on a lot of wine bottles.  Something to think about.

You could be plastered all over these New York wines.

Benny Hill Sommelier

Posted in Wine Memes by Ryan O'Connell on March 11, 2009

Benny Hill, as a wine sommelier, teaches us a thing or two about wine pouring and wine snobs.

Glomski & Maynard Wine Documentary

Posted in Wine Memes by Ryan O'Connell on March 8, 2009

There’s a new wine documentary in the pipes, and I cannot find any actual source for it.  I know this is the light-hearted meme blog that doesn’t get bogged down in parenthetical citations.  But I seriously can’t find any of the original sources on this story.

According to lots of sites, “The Pulse of Radio” is carrying the story, but I don’t see it on their site.  Maynard (who is most famous for being the musician behind Tool and A Perfect Circle and is now promoting a project called Puscifer) has a vineyard in Arizona called Arizona Stronghold Vineyards.  This much is true.  The speculative part is that there’s a documentary about Maynard and the main winemaker attached to the project, Eric Glomski.  This would be cool.

I’m assuming that Maynard is doing this because he thinks it’s fun and interesting.  Which means the wine is probably fun and interesting.  And the movie will probably be fun and interesting.  If I could find any confirmation of this story, I’d be very happy.

Wine Cork Business Card Holder

Posted in 1 by Ryan O'Connell on March 8, 2009

Cool instructions on how to turn a cork into a place card or business card holder. You just get your exacto out and slice a line big enough for the card or cards.  Then you want to slice off a short arc from the bottom of the cork to give it a flat bottom.  TADA!

Business Cards held up by corks.

Name plates or business cards held up by corks. DIY!